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Old 10-10-1999, 02:31 PM   #1

NutWrench's Avatar
An oldie but a goodie
Q: How many UBB users does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Exactly Five Hundred:

1 to change the light bulb and to post to the newsgroup that the light bulb has been changed.
7 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.
4 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.
17 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.
21 to flame the spell checkers.
49 to write to the group moderator complaining about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this group.
20 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames.
32 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this thread to alt.lite.bulb.
69 to demand that crossposting to alt.grammar, alt.spelling and alt.punctuation about changing light bulbs be stopped.
41 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are** relevant to this group.
106 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty.
12 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs.
8 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly, and to post corrected URLs.
2 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group.
15 to concatenate all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and footers, and then add pointedly, "Me Too."
6 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.
9 to quote the "Me Too's" and happily add, "Me Three!"
3 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.
1 to propose new alt.change.lite.bulb newsgroup.
24 to say this is just what alt.physic.cold_fusion was meant for, leave it here.
53 votes for alt.lite.bulb.

"If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled."
NutWrench is offline  
Old 10-10-1999, 04:08 PM   #2
Re: An oldie but a goodie
Millions of innocent plants are murdered every day, to feed the hideous cravings of vegetarians and vegans like.
Brought to you by the People For Photosynthesis
Draco is offline  
Old 10-10-1999, 04:20 PM   #3
Re: An oldie but a goodie


"If you can't beat them, join them --- then beat them."

"I think Unicorns are KICKASS!!!"
JeremyGritton is offline  
Old 10-10-1999, 04:26 PM   #4
Re: An oldie but a goodie
Oh and NutWrench, have you seen these light bulbs?! Lighting for Home

If you can't laugh at yourself, then make fun of others.
AIM: DMstupid
(like anybody wants it.)

Old 10-10-1999, 06:30 PM   #5
Re: An oldie but a goodie
Sitting on light bulbs is fun
Thea is offline  
Old 10-10-1999, 06:41 PM   #6
Re: An oldie but a goodie

If you can't laugh at yourself, then make fun of others.
AIM: DMstupid
(like anybody wants it.)

Old 10-10-1999, 08:33 PM   #7
Re: An oldie but a goodie

"It wasn't supposed to turn out like this.." (Sebastian "Doyle" Krist)

Our wines leave you nothing to hope for

Old 10-10-1999, 09:46 PM   #8
Re: An oldie but a goodie
It true. That's the sad part...

GamesRealm: GZ News

"Is that stud coming?"
"Excuse me?"
"Ah, so now he [sic] have silly Ivory Tower nonsense." - Draco
X-human is offline  
Old 10-10-1999, 10:33 PM   #9
Re: An oldie but a goodie
What about the spammers? You should have like 100 posts advertising "hot, steamy action" and stuff.
Big Brother is watching. Dress accordingly.
MrEricSir is offline  
Old 10-11-1999, 02:03 AM   #10

Superczar's Avatar
Re: An oldie but a goodie
Haha, that was pretty good Nutwrench... it would only take one to delete that thread though

New day... New tomorrow...
I'm not living in the past...
Changing, the illusion...
I'm set free... free at last...
Reality... A new beginning...

'F*** Fresch!!!'.
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Old 10-11-1999, 09:59 AM   #11

Volt9000's Avatar
Re: An oldie but a goodie
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Sitting on light bulbs is fun <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Me too!

Volt9000 is offline  
Old 10-11-1999, 12:42 PM   #12
Delphi Dude
Re: An oldie but a goodie
Me three.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>It true. That's the sad part...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You suck X-Human, you're a lamer who can't even spell.

Now it's just like a real unmoderated newsgroup.
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