Upcoming Duke Nukem XXX parody?

[Mr Bear]

Note: All links provided in this post are youtube PG-rated trailers.

Well, in case any of you weren't aware(or at least most of you will pretend that is the case), the latest trend in adult movies are triple-X rated spoofs of popular mainstream TV shows and movies. From Seinfeld, Roseanne, Friends, and Scrubs to The X-Files, Batman and many, MANY more, just about every single piece of recent pop culture has been satirized with look-alike(some surprisingly close) porn actors and recreated sets(also frequently done shockingly faithfully).

Now, I wrote an e-mail to one of the primary studios producing these "movies" asking whether or not we'd ever see a Duke Nukem parody, explaining why Duke would practically be perfect for such a topic.

The next day I received a response telling me that the idea was already under "serious consideration" and would "probably become a reality within the next year or so, or 'When It's Done'. ;-)"-that's actually what they wrote!!!!

Could you imagine such a release coinciding with the return of Duke in DNF??

If done well, I'm sure such a spoof could help bring Duke back into the public eye, or at the very least be a damn entertaining fun, um, ride.

[WarThrash]

what is this i don't even...

[Commando Nukem]

What the ****?

Oh yeah, thats totally what Duke Nukem needs to reclaim a mainstream appeal. A porno. Yeah.

Duke may have had some sexual content, but first and foremost its about a muscular dude with a groovy hair cut and shades blasting aliens with incredibly large guns.

...Just an aside, he doesnt need to reclaim anything. Just release a good game and he'll be a success.

[Kray]

I can hear the Duke actor now "suck it down." Ya I know its a monster that says it in the game but still lol.

[ZuljinRaynor]

[Xgthug]

WTF? We can't even find the right actor for the feature film.

The Duke Nukem community wants to see Duke KICK ass, not GET it.

[Commando Nukem]

Originally Posted by Kray

I can hear the Duke actor now "suck it down." Ya I know its a monster that says it in the game but still lol.

Duke says it too.

[Duke's New Chainsaw]

Yeah. The Assault Commander uses Duke's taunts.

[PsychoGoatee]

This is... well, it's hilarious. I doubt it'll happen, and well video game porn parody is a bit more niche than movie or TV porn parody. Still, funny idea.

[Xgthug]

It's been done. Ron Jeremy as Mario.

(PS. I don't care what anybody says... that guy has a TINY penis!)

[DerricktheW]

I'm here to screw ass and chew bubblegum.




And I'm all outta gum.

[pjVgt]

I would prefer Duke Nukem Porn Trilogy:

1. Duke Nukem: Home Video (exclusive for VHS)
2. Duke Nukem: Suck it down in LA (exclusive for Betamax)
3. Duke Nukem: Anal Expander (exclusive for HD-DVD)

Now I am thinking about microwave expander... hmmm... always thought why Duke uses such useless weapon anyways...

That just reminded me when around 1997 I tried to make a gay duke nukem parody called EURODUKE:

- changed sounds (to make them pathetic like "pewpew!" when shooting ripper and "meanie!" instead of mutant growls)
- changed music (to upbeat cheap eurodance)
- changed textures (to pink wallpapers with ponies and crap)
- changed sprites (enemies had rainbow colored afros, red high heels, stockings, pink corsets and so on...)

Sadly mod died with my Western Digital 540MB during the great flood of 1997. It wasn`t that good - textures were misaligned, sounds were bad and art was afwul but it was strangely fun to play.

[PsychoGoatee]

Here's a good name for a Duke porno:

DUKE ****EM

[pjVgt]

Duke suck`em

[crunchy superman]

This is hilarious! "suck it down" - lol!

[The Dukenator]

Originally Posted by pjVgt

That just reminded me when around 1997 I tried to make a gay duke nukem parody called EURODUKE:

- changed sounds (to make them pathetic like "pewpew!" when shooting ripper and "meanie!" instead of mutant growls)
- changed music (to upbeat cheap eurodance)
- changed textures (to pink wallpapers with ponies and crap)
- changed sprites (enemies had rainbow colored afros, red high heels, stockings, pink corsets and so on...)

Sadly mod died with my Western Digital 540MB during the great flood of 1997. It wasn`t that good - textures were misaligned, sounds were bad and art was afwul but it was strangely fun to play.

Maybe you should recreate it, but with fixes.

[pjVgt]

Originally Posted by The Dukenator

Maybe you should recreate it, but with fixes.

I think right now it would be impossible - long time ago I forgot how to use artedit (or editart? dont reallty remember) and lack of time (I was little shit back then with too much free time in my hands).

[PukeBurger]

Originally Posted by crunchy superman

This is hilarious! "suck it down" - lol!

"Blow it out your ass"

[pjVgt]

"Your face... Your ass... - what's the difference?"

[WarThrash]

"I'll rip off your head and c*m down your neck!"

Too far?

[Kray]

The closest thing to a Duke porno now is is Flesh Gordon 1 & 2, which is a softcore porno on Flash Gordon. I'm guessing if the movie happens it will be Duke saving chicks from aliens and having sex with the former. Maybe they can get Jon St. John to dub the actor lol.

[Xgthug]

I saw a really bad Duke3D Hentai on Duke4.net. XD

[JobivanHiob]

I literally laughed off my ass while reading every single post.

A Duke Porn Movie is the funniest and grossest idea ever i read on these boards.

I would prob watch it.

[Water12356]

Porn is something that I never want to see involving Duke... ever. And aside from that fact, this thread is not even remotely appropriate for these forums.